At which point I saw a police officer standing right outside my window.
As I rolled down the window, the first thing that popped into my head was, "If I confess to a crime, I wonder if they would let me sleep in a jail cell..."
The officer kindly asked me if everything was ok, and I told him that my 3 year old just had to potty. He nodding understandingly and headed back to his patrol car. I heroically resisted the urge to ask to be hauled in to take a nap in a cell...
We have had a rough go in the Incredible family recently. Our dear boys can't stand to be apart, and yet can't stand to be together. And, at the moment, Incredibaby is covered from head to toe with spots. I am quite sure there are days when I don't sit down (even while pumping) and there are days when I don't talk to anyone over the age of reason until 8pm.
I see mothers of many whose daily rhythms seem so much more peaceful than ours. I have been praying to St. Anne and Our Lady to help us establish a peaceful home life.
Then, over the course of a week, I was flooded with thoughts, encouragement and advice. At a homeschooling meeting, mothers of 7+ children encouraged me and told me that having three little ones was the biggest challenge for them. The other builders encouraged me with their kind words. Katherine summed up so well what I have been thinking about recently:
I think the particular season of mothering, when every aspect of serving others is on your shoulders, is the most intense period of the asceticism of motherhood.
There is much dying to self when you are taking care of just little ones. Your needs must always come second (or third or fourth). But there is a purifying aspect to this. What a blessing to be demanded to give so much. Left to my own weak will, surely I would not be disciplined to do so.
God-willing, we will go through many seasons of mothering our children. This is one of them. But is all part of God's divine plan for us and our salvation.
Prayer of Abandonment
I abandon myself into your hands;
do with me what you will.
Whatever you may do, I thank you:
I am ready for all, I accept all.
Let only your will be done in me,
and in all your creatures -
I wish no more than this, O Lord.
Into your hands I commend my soul:
I offer it to you with all the love of my heart,
for I love you, Lord, and so need to give myself,
to surrender myself into your hands without reserve,
and with boundless confidence,
for you are my Father.
Charles de Foucauld